![]() I was reading along a “stranger danger” thread on Twitter and got worried I was doing something wrong. I’m autistic, and sometimes the little daily parenting etiquettes pass me by. I’m not a parent but I do live with and help raise my three small siblings. Just act as bored as someone who’s just been forced to endure a co-worker’s description of the plot of the “superior” Star Wars prequels. Don’t have any more long talks with her about when or when not to tell an adult. Seriously: Just say “I’m not interested in that” whenever she comes to you complaining that her brother sent her back to Home because he drew a Sorry! card, and that’s not fair. At home, you can discourage her by treating her tattletaling with utter disinterest and disdain. In fact, Zoom class is the ideal forum for tattletaling, because it allows the teacher to ignore the tattletale without all her classmates knowing what a pain in the ass she’s being in the DMs. No one wants to hang with someone who is constantly narcing on them! Teachers are exceptionally good at dealing with tattletales, and I would not worry about this behavior in Zoom class. I agree that this certainly has something to do with your daughter’s lack of classroom friends. Here you are, rushing to report your child’s behavior to the nearest authority, an internet advice column! ![]() The impulse to tell tales is as old as time itself. How do I explain to her that the world is not against her? If it’s frustrating for us now, it must have been harder on her teacher, but no amount of talks on when or when not to tell an adult about a problem are working. She wasn’t like this at home before quarantine, but I think she was like this at school. When she and her brother play a board game, she gets upset and goes to me or my husband whenever he’s supposedly cheating by bumping her back to start or making her give up a good card. I was sitting in on her Zoom calls the first week of school, and after a breakout room, she would message the teacher and tell her everything the other kids did that was “mean” such as getting a role she wanted, interrupting her, or correcting her. But now that she and my 12-year-old son are at home, I think she wasn’t making friends for a reason: She’s a huge tattletale. ![]() When I asked her, she just said that all the kids in her class were annoying. īefore quarantine, my 8-year-old daughter had no friends in her class, but was friends with a bunch of kids in her grade, so I didn’t think much of it. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here or post it in the Slate Parenting Facebook group. Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column.
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